Go to this link below. I go more in depth about what I've experienced in listening and seeking mentor ship from others.
I struggle with this a lot. I'm constantly catching myself going other places in my mind. Whether I'm watching TV, reading a book, sitting in class, talking with someone in person or over the phone. There is something about being given information that my brain resists. I want to hear what is being said but I can't seem to control my thoughts and fully zone in on what's being said. It's a constant struggle to be present, as the past and the future inform everything. I often times believe that what I'm thinking is right. I know that what is being said has value, but my mind thinks it has the answer already.
Listening is more than hearing, you're registering what is being said and reciprocating with words that follow. My friend Junie McGraw is an amazing listener, and is great at recreating what has just been said. He actually cares about what is being said and contributing to it.
"Anything you want for yourself or your life is one conversation away." - Not Sure
Being listened to is one of the greatest gift you can give or receive from somebody. It validates your existence and empowers you. Listening is a sharing your ears for some one else. Listening to someone is gratifying, people like to talk about themselves and if you let them and ask good questions they'll appreciate you and share themselves. In politics no one is listened to, they are just waiting to get their next point out to try and prove the other person wrong. THERE IS A REASON WE HAVE TWO EARS AND ONE MOUTH.
"Listening is Doing." - Sandford Meisner (I think)
When you find yourself trying to be right, or proving someone wrong just listen to them first. Don't hear them through the filter of "You're wrong, I'm right." No body likes to be "proven" wrong, but if you allow them to discover for themselves through your listening then they can prove it to themselves. Have EMPATHY.
"The defeated are always left unhappy." Buddha
I seek mentor ship from lots of folks, and they are all happy and grateful that I am reaching out to them. And of course the best way to listen is through empathy versus "You're wrong, I'm right." If you want more empathy in your life, talk to my good friend Lou Agosta!
Empathy is oxygen for the soul. Short of breath due to lack of listening. Get expanded empathy - get some here!ReplyDelete
One more thing: I appreciate the acknowledgement, and I can see the similarity of empathy and humor [to which I know the author of the post is committed] - one traverses a boundary in both cases - and in the case of empathy the other person is left whole and complete and in the case of humor the other person is life - laughing (and whole and complete).ReplyDelete
It's the essence of improv and, thus, life.ReplyDelete
Be here now. ~Ram Dass